Therapy during separation, divorce, and relationship breakdown

Relationships end in a number of different ways, and the way yours ended shapes what you are dealing with now.

Some end slowly. The distance builds over years, and by the time anyone says it out loud there is very little left to work with. Some end suddenly, and you have spent every day since going back through the same conversations looking for the moment you missed. Some end because of an affair, and the person carrying that could be either of you. Some have not ended at all, and the hardest part is not knowing whether to stay.

Sometimes the question is whether to end it at all. That decision often sits unresolved for a long time, carried privately while everything else gets managed.

This is a place to think it through properly. Sessions look at what is actually happening, what has already been tried, what would change and what would not, and what you can live with either way. You will not be steered toward a particular answer.

Infidelity is disorienting from whichever side of it you are on.

If you were betrayed, you may be dealing with intrusive thoughts and a compulsive need for details, alongside the strange experience of grieving a relationship you are still inside. Trust is not something you can decide to restore.

If you were the one who had the affair, you may be carrying shame that is difficult to speak about anywhere, along with real questions about how it happened and what it says about the relationship you were in.

Both are workable in individual therapy.

Being blindsided produces a particular kind of distress. Most people describe constant rumination, an urge to check on the other person, and a habit of replaying conversations looking for what they missed. It is hard to accept an explanation that does not explain enough.

Part of the work is understanding what happened. Part of it is learning to function while you do not have an answer, because the answer may not be coming.

The practical process of separating brings its own load. Legal proceedings, dividing a household, telling children, and managing family reactions all happen on a timeline you do not control.

Co-parenting with someone you are in conflict with is a longer-term challenge. Communication is difficult, ordinary decisions become disputes, and you have to maintain a working relationship with someone you would not otherwise speak to.

Not everyone who comes here is ending something. Some people are working on a relationship that has become difficult. That might be a long-distance relationship, or reunifying after time apart, or a partner who wants distance while you want closeness. Sometimes it is a conversation that never quite gets had, because it costs more than it seems worth.

Individual therapy is a reasonable way to work on a relationship, and many people use it that way.

Therapy here is a working conversation. If you want to think something through with an experienced professional who will engage rather than reflect the question back to you, that is what this is.

She asks direct questions and tells you what she is noticing. You can expect language for what is happening and something practical to work with.

The end of a relationship is not treated as a problem in you. How someone leaves a relationship usually says more about how they cope than about what you were worth, and that distinction gets lost quickly when you are the one left holding it.

What surrounds the situation matters too. Money, housing, custody, immigration status, and family expectations all shape what is actually available to a person. 

Individual therapy for adults 18 and over. Sessions are 50 minutes at $145, with 90-minute sessions available at $210. In person in Huntsville or virtually anywhere in Ontario.

A limited number of sliding scale appointments is available each month. Separation is expensive, and it is worth raising at the consultation if cost is a barrier.

Everything begins with a free 30-minute conversation.

In-person therapy in Huntsville

Therapy for therapists

Session fees